My Friend, Japan

What is this? The sun is now setting at a later time, and I am overjoyed at the fact daylight is slowly increasing again. I've had quite enough of the winter darkness. Sometimes I am jealous of the bears that sleep all winter. What a life.

Probably not too realistic though. What excitement though, that spring is heading this way, oh so slowly. As I was walking yesterday, I saw a flock of birds in their typical V, heading north. I was so beside myself with excitement and fascination - exclaiming in my head that this must be a sign of spring's forthcoming arrival. Although to many, the weather really may seem like nothing, what with endless sunny days and daytime temps typically around the 40s or 50s. Yet, I rarely leave the warmth of my heater. Nonetheless! I await spring with anticipation.

So tomorrow marks 6 months since I arrived in Japan (and ironically, today marks 6 months till the wedding). The months have surely flown by, and yet at times the days have a tendency of dragging on forever. Lately I have been contemplating the development of this pre-wedding relationship between David and I - how it changes, adjusts, and adapts. The more I thought, I realized the same idea applies to my relationship with Japan. Yes, relationship.

Those first days of overwhelming amazement, awe and fascination, strikes out on that note. I "fell in love" so to speak, as it wooed me... As time went on, its characteristics became more or less normal, feeling nothing out of the ordinary. I wave my hand to anything..."oh yes it's just Japan." And then, I realized recently, as time has continued, Japan has become a dear friend. As I learn its strengths and weaknesses, good and bad points, and experience it for what it really and truly is, it touches a deeper part of my heart. It reveals its true self, showing vulnerability and yet, unveiling the beauty God bestowed on it from its beginnings.

Though I still experience times outside of my comfort zone (which I am thankful for), this place is a comfort to me. I love to share its joys and sorrows, of course, primarily from my personality, and an outsider. I enjoy getting to know it, to learn about it, and understand it. So, I find there isn't another way to describe how I feel now about it other than express the blossoming of my friendship with Japan.

Of course, it likes to tease me as many of my friends do, and David (who leaves me with sore abs and cheek muscles from laughing so hard when we're together). A couple weeks ago, I put out a few items of laundry to hang in the sun for a bit. Since it has been so dry here, I usually hang the laundry inside to up the humidity a bit, but this particular day I thought to hang some outside. Well, as I mentioned previously, Shizuoka is a wind tunnel or something, at least western Shizuoka. Normally, if the wind is blowing and my clothes are out, they just get blown together at one end of my drying pole. But not this day.

I am sitting on my computer, as usual, after I hang the clothes outside. A little while later, I suddenly hear a crash and some other loud noises. I run to the balcony and pop out the door, to find nothing but a pair of underwear laying on the balcony floor. Um, WHERE are my CLOTHES??? I practically hang over the balcony railing in search of my clothing items, figuring they must have fallen into someone's yard. Sure enough, they had. Interestingly enough, not the neighbor directly below me, but the neighbor below and adjacent to me. There were my clothes, strewn about the yard, one shirt caught on a hook outside their back door.

I ran downstairs and rang the neighbor's doorbell. No one home. Blast. I ran back upstairs and wrote a note, detailing all the items I had lost in their yard to tape to their door for when they arrived back home. Thankfully, the note worked and all my clothes were returned. Probably the most important point of this story is that somehow the underwear had slung itself off the hanger and flipped back to the balcony while everything else decided to take a trip to the neighbor's yard. That, I believe, saved quite a bit of embarrassment for me and the man who brought my clothes back. Ah....sumimasen....

Friends also like to do nice things for friends - and because of various health issues I have been dealing with over the past couple years, I am going to try a stringent diet for a couple months or possibly longer (it's not weight related, so don't worry, if anything I could stand to gain a pound or two) to see if I can't fix anything. Well, to my amazement, I have suddenly discovered various websites I can order all kinds of organic and whole foods from, even vegetables. I was smiling and dancing around my apartment by all this good news. And when a box of goodies I ordered from one place came, it was like Christmas opening it. (It really did feel more like Christmas than the actual Christmas, at least the opening presents part.) So, we'll see how this goes.

Speaking of food, I need to go clean up the kitchen and make something to eat. Here's to 6 months.

The Inspiration of Food

The winter months tend to be so dark and cold, when all you feel like doing is curling up on the couch with some hot tea, an inviting fire in the fireplace. Unfortunately, I lack two of those things, so my space heater and cup of chai satisfy for now. The fire is more for the ambiance than the warmth, but the couch I long for on a daily basis. Consequently, David hears about this couch yearning on an almost daily basis. That, among various other things, including a cat. It is as if I believe the simple act of repeating this information to him constantly will magically make them appear immediately after we move into wherever we will be living later this year. What can I say, I am always hopeful.

The kitchen, or in my case, lack thereof, has become a sort of solace from the cold and darkness. I usually enjoy cooking and baking, although it can be dependent on my mood or energy. It isn't atypical for me to pour myself a huge bowl of cereal with yogurt when I feel unmotivated or tired. However, during the winter break, when I spent much of my time the last week at home by myself, my excitement for cooking and experimentation was revived to a level similar to pre-Japan.

So let me introduce my new obsession: food blogs. As I perused the internet searching for recipe ideas I stumbled across some gems. Good food blogs incorporate tried recipes, mouth-watering photos and often little heart-felt anecdotes. My mindless hours were turned into warm adventures of the cuisine nature - marking and e-mailing various recipes, and then spending inordinate amounts of time at various super markets searching for ingredients to stock my tiny kitchen.

These ingredients all soon turned into edible masterpieces over the next week and the time following since then. I have brought the focus of my eating back to whole foods, and limiting refined, processed foods as much as possible. Living in Seattle, this wasn't hard to do, since you've got Whole Foods, PCC, Farmer's Markets, and various other organic and whole food type stores. So, living in Japan has been somewhat of a challenge for this, since they are limited when it comes to organics, and some healthy foods tend to be on the expensive side. (i.e. Brown rice is much more expensive here than I had ever found it to be in Western Washington). Fortunately, my local store has a small organics section, and I have found some places I can order from online. Now if only I could find more organic produce!

One recipe in particular I wanted to mention on this blog is for frozen yogurt. I found the recipe on one of my favorite food blogs, 101 Cookbooks. I have been missing Red Mango desperately since moving here, its soft, creamy peaks topped with bright raspberries and tiny chocolate chips - bite after bite surrounding the tongue in cold, sweet tanginess. Not to mention, the health benefits of yogurt. So after reading this recipe I immediately ordered an ice cream maker from amazon.jp, and it arrived within 2 days.

I spent about an hour at the super market deciphering yogurt labels in Japanese, to determine which would allow me to make excellent frozen yogurt. My first attempt was rather pathetic, as I wasn't patient enough to strain the yogurt correctly, and then I foolishly stopped the maker after it had started to try and fix the churn paddle. This last step immediately froze the yogurt into stiffness. No frozen yogurt that night.

My second attempt was the one to write home about. After allowing my yogurt to strain in the fridge while I was at work, then whipping it up with some honey, I plugged in the ice cream maker, pressed the "on" button, and scooped the yogurt into the churn. I went about my business as it noisily churned for about 20 minutes. I went back to check it, and to my delight, I was met with an overflowing bucket of soft, creamy fro-yo. I happily ate the entire thing (two large bowls) and felt a bit sick later that evening - but I don't regret it, as it was perfectly satiating to my taste buds.

Some other notable food blogs I discovered for my particular pursuits are: Gluten-Free Girl and Elana's Pantry. Both are gluten-free, but I find them full of healthy ideas, and relying less on foods that aren't as whole or healthy. Each links to more food blogs, but even just a web search will highlight various blogs depending on your particular cravings.

One thing I have realized is that reading about other people's cooking experiences motivates me to create my own culinary experiences. Similarly, as I also was reading various other blogs of different nature, I also find that other's lives inspire me as well. Much like reading a book, feeling inspired by the character's outcomes (non-fiction or fiction) and finding new motivation to move forward in whatever area of your life. Like discovering new tastes and ideas, new recipes for life may abound.

So as my motivation to cook has intensified, so has my motivation in other parts of my life. Rediscovering purpose in the face of change, learning how the changes apply and subsequently understanding the results, whether immediate or distant. To gain perspective is like gaining freedom, because the future becomes less fearful.

What am I referring to specifically? Probably a myriad of things - anything and everything I think about on a daily basis. It has already been almost 6 months since I've been in Japan, and how strange as it has felt so short. I still feel that I am adapting more each day, learning more each day, not just about Japan and its people, but about myself, who I am and where I am going. In that sense, being here is an outlet for me, a space to stretch the thoughts and inspire creativity. I've grown quite fond of it.

Anyway. I've finished my tea. It was nice chatting with you.

Don't Know Why You Say Goodbye, I Say Hello...

Has anyone been wondering why the title of my blog is Sayonara, Goodbye? Well, if you've read the first post it was probably quite obvious as I hashed out a final dedication to my life in Seattle. I said goodbye to Seattle, and 9 hours later, hello to Japan. It was a physical and metaphysical farewell, to what had become a place close to my heart, and a life, identity, so familiar to me. The events of these past months have ensured a continual goodbye, to most of what I know of myself. The New Year faded in as listlessly as any other stroke of midnight... I shift my eyes to the clock, noticing it's 12, and find my mind drift to another thought. In fact it was today (January 2nd) that I realized for the first time it was actually 2009, and only because I saw some poster in Hamamatsu with a big, fat 2009 plastered across it. Just as we all say goodbye to an old year, I've been doing the same to myself.

Before you start to think I'm becoming depressed from culture shock or something, don't worry, it's my identity that is getting the boot here, not my physical self. To most of you will probably come as no surprise that marriage is a big part of this identity-loss, but also just being in a place where my independence is being stretched and challenged in various ways to reshape it. My thinking, perspectives, ideals, are constantly being shaped, and mostly by listening to other people talk, and how they act. I am becoming different, just as I had spent the past several years figuring out WHO I was. So now, who am I and who will I become? Probably a better, maybe the best, version of myself, so why fight the process.

Foreigners living in Japan, with little Japanese ability (including myself, I'm working on it!) can formulate all kinds of preconceptions and perspectives on how people think, their intentions, cause and effect, etc. I seem to hear a lot of generalizations of Japan and the people, even by those who have more language ability and have lived here for some time. Sometimes, I am also tempted to generalize ways of life and how people are, but usually I end up taking a step back when I hear someone else generalizing something. Though Japan is quite homogeneous, I still find many exceptions, and it makes me think of how easy it is for humans, to be so influenced by not only their own culture but also their geographical or social "sphere" (ethnocentrism). We are limited to our experience, what we see, but we sub-consciously find ease in coming up with these generalizations or beliefs, because they are true in "our" world. Fascinating.

I thought of this today riding my bike back from the train station. The winter is so dry here in Shizuoka, but with perpetually clear skies. The mountains are beautifully blue and sharp in northwest, taking turns rolling up and down. Mt.Fuji sits as a backdrop to these in the northernmost corner of them... never visible in the summer, but the clear skies bring out its snow-capped top. Towards the south, where I live, are the green hills, the ocean far behind them. I thought of how beautiful the scenery is, and thought of how beautiful the scenery is in Washington, with mountains wherever the eye looks and beautiful waterscapes. It occurred to me as I contemplated generalizations, that scenery such as this is shared everywhere. They are all different, all with their own characteristics, but the general makeup is essentially the same. To put it more concretely, whenever I think about the differences, often cultural, the similarities always come to mind at the same time. It is a balance of the two, with a basic underlying nature. Generalizations - just don't always work.

Enough of the philosophical pondering. So, as yesterday was New Year's in Japan, I felt I should do something culturally applicable. I haven't really been doing much else this past week as it was winter break and I've been enjoying lounging around at home. My supervisor had suggested I visit a nearby temple, which is apparently quite popular. It literally is only about a 15-20 minute bike ride from my apartment, just up the hill, but I just hadn't gone yet. So, I figured I would go to the temple, which is what many (if not most) Japanese people do during those first few days of the New Year, as is customary.

So, I hopped on my bike and pedaled out onto the street. Now, something important to know about Shizuoka, particularly where I am, is that the winter brings lots of WIND. It reminds me of Ellensburg (WA), the wind tunnel. So we have these super strong westerly winds, which makes bike travel quite an epic battle, as most of the main direction I go seems to usually be west. So as I pedaled out of the apartment driveway, I was hit by a huge blast of wind which knocked my bike off course. I pedaled maybe 5 more seconds when my ears started aching, that sharp pain you get from doing active things in the cold. I had to go back and grab my hat, which I have a tendency of forgetting and then regretting when I'm out biking against these freezing gusts.

I reach the main arterial near my apartment and find a long line of cars, stretched out past the bridge that crosses north/south over the train tracks that run east/west. I turn south up the hill, past my high school, down the hill to 7/11, to the bookstore next to the traffic light. I realize at this point the line of cars is also going to my destination, the temple. Makes it easier for me, I thought, now I know I won't get lost (although you all know having an iPhone, I can't really "get" lost anymore). So I pedaled gleefully on the sidewalk past all the cars, laughing to myself that I was going to get there before all of them. Honestly, these people would get there faster walking really. Then, my sidewalk ended.

So I kept on the shoulder for awhile but almost was driven off into some tea fields b/c of how narrow it was. I pulled off onto a sidestreet to determine my current location and figure out an alternate route. Some Brazilians walking by said hello and laughed at me, and then asked if I was ok in Japanese, but I think they were making fun of me, although I'm not entirely sure why. To any bystander I just looked as if checking my phone, could have been text messaging for all they knew. I may have had some odd expression on my face, but I have no idea.

I determined my alternate route and rode the shoulder on the opposite side of the road (yes, GASP, against traffic). I took a right and headed UP the hill and into this cool tunnel. I emerged to find myself surrounded by tea fields, everywhere, and windmills. I happily pedaled along with no traffic until right up to the end, where again, line of cars. After arriving at the main area, which turned out to be quite large with lots of buildings, I headed past all the food vendors and into the crowds. Weaving in and out, getting run into by small Japanese children, and speeding past people content to walk behind the people in front of them like cattle (I hate crowds). I discovered this temple place has a teahouse, which was quite exciting.

Then, in front of me, I gasp. The largest flight of stairs. Ever. In Kyoto, there were plenty of staircases since these temples seem to like stairs for some reason, but this... was just insane. I would liken it to the grand staircase at Kyoto station (which for the record, I walked down, not up). Groaning in my head, and cursing stairs under my breath, I headed up, still weaving in and out of people, tripping over small children and speeding past women in heels who seem to be having difficulties. In efforts to take stress off my knees I work on using my glutes and hamstrings. Like a workout video or something "1, 2, 3, rest, 1, 2, 3, rest". My heart rate rises since I don't do enough cardio exercise (biking doesn't seem to do anything for me most of the time) and I reach the middle. I think I am at the top, then I look up. More stairs. I mutter that this temple better be worth all this exertion. Then I think I can tell David I exercised by climbing this gigantic staircase. I think that I should come back everyday just to climb these stairs. I think that I forgot to get a water bottle on my way here. Etc....

Then, I practically fall on my face as I reach the top. I was so distracted in my thinking I didn't realize I had reached the top and so I took another imaginary stair step and stumbled forward. But there was the temple, packed with people. I am not sure what they were doing but it must have been something at least semi-important. I didn't care to wait in the line so I sort of meandered around briefly, took a few pictures, told myself to come back when its not so busy, and then headed down in search of food.

That was the extent of my New Year's "celebration". Again today there were long lines of cars headed to the temple... some all the way to the train station (maybe 4 miles I would guess). I was a fool to attempt running errands today, so I can't wait for things to settle back into a routine again. Same for me, I have enjoyed having a break, and I don't really want to go back to work yet, but I know I need to get back into some kind of routine again. Not that I ever really had one to begin with...

Speaking of the break, Christmas was last week. I made treats for David and his brother since I was visiting them, and I have to say the pumpkin bread I made turned out amazing. I kept thinking to myself how I wanted to eat it all up except that I wanted to give it to the guys. I also made another batch for some of my students who came for a "christmas party" on Christmas Eve. I made food, they brought a bunch of food (mostly treats) and we sat around and ate food and played some games, listened to Christmas music and chatted. It was such a blessing really, to be able to have time like that with them, when they are uninhibited and speak freely about things, also in English. That is the kind of thing I have been missing from Seattle, when I got to hang out with the kids I worked with, spending time with them, and it wasn't all structured. They are sweet kids, and kept talking about dangerous Japanese mothers. I also taught them the difference between a crush and a boyfriend (for English). Such vital English, I know.

Anyway back to Christmas Day, so I hopped on the Shinkansen to Tokyo. My new trick riding the Shinkansen now is to buy unreserved tickets (cheaper), and then I find two empty seats, I sit in the aisle seat (since I feel more comfortable on the aisle, I hate feeling trapped in window seats) and then put my stuff in the next seat. I then pretend I am asleep at every stop so people don't sit next to me. Although, they are usually scared of me anyway I think. Its a strange little quirk I have I suppose.

After I arrived at my destination in Tokyo, Ikebukuro, I somehow had to figure out where to meet David and his brother, and I wanted to crawl into a corner because of how busy it was. It is one of the busiest train stations in Tokyo, but they tend to stress me out, so I usually have my headphones in my ears to at least alleviate some of the situation.

After meeting up with the guys, the day was spent getting food, looking at fun electronic toys in Akihabara (me wishing I had money because there were so many fun things to buy and I didn't have any money to spend), getting more food and playing some videogames. It has been so long since I have played Time Crisis or any shooting game and so when they started playing one and I took a turn and all the old feelings came back. My turn ended so quickly - oh so sad.... how I miss the shooting games. We played the taiko drum game too... which I love to play, and I liked it the first time because I beat David's brother but then I played against David and he beat me. Psh. (I totally pretend I don't pay attention to the score but we all know that's all I pay attention to). Actually the last couple songs we did I couldn't pick up the rhythm at all so I just started randomly pounding and squealing and making exasperated noises. I failed.

The rest of the time was nice and I love staying in hotels... and got to see where they lived when they were younger and meet people they know and whatnot. It was a nice break. I was sad when I had to go back home. As much as I love ol' Fukuroi...

Well. What did this all have to do with goodbye. Just saying goodbye to 2008 and all that happened. Time to move on, look ahead, move forward, all that. Not in any stereotypical "New Year's goals" kind of way, but just to realize that sometimes its time to just let things go, and accept the changes to come... embrace them as essentials to growth and learning, and just, good change. So its just that time of year, to say goodbye, to myself and who I've been up until now - and say hello to everything new.

And to say goodbye for this blog entry, which has become so extensively long. Goodbye to sleeping-in too. Till next time.